Karl Oscar Weber

You are not Special

This morning Tania and I woke up at the same time. Lying in bed, she turns to me: "I want a divorce.",

"HUH? What? Why?",

"You cheated on me.", I had, in fact, not cheated on her.

"When did this happen?",

"I had a dream", Ah yes. A Dream. It's another one of those dreams.

Days that begin with the cheating dream are, interesting, to navigate. Amicable, yet terse conversation. Quietly executing on routine. "I have never, and will never cheat on you. It was just a dream.", I rose from bed to make her breakfast. Being stuck at home for weeks has instilled new habits. Every morning I make her 3 eggs, not scrambled, not under cooked, in olive oil, with cilantro, pepper, and a pinch of salt.

Yesterday she frowned at the eggs, "They look ugly. How could you bring these to me?", "Well the yokes broke a little when I flipped them.", this was not a satisfying answer. I made her new eggs, and ate the first batch. She didn't complain the second time. I think I made the right decision to make those eggs again.

Today she told me that she doesn't really like egg yolks at all, "but the kids like them.", A detail that I was happy to learn. After 10 years I'm still learning things. "I'll just give you egg whites tomorrow." It's astonishing how simply being kind makes everything better.

I'm certain I'm not the only person to wake up next to their partner, that's angry, because of what they did in their dreams. It's probably common. Thousands must have woken up on that same day and had that same conversation. A thousand ways to say sorry, or to say fine, whatever. Some of these people have recovered, some haven't. Some laughed about it. Others received a firm slap to the face. Maybe even a punch? There is a poor fellow sleeping in their car tonight, with a black eye, somewhere.

In all of this shared experience, that I of course imagine to be true. In all of it I find great comfort. Someone, somewhere, has taken the path that I didn't, experienced the consequences of the dream, differently. That makes me happy.